Starting kindergarten: How to help your child

Starting kindergarten entails many changes for your child, and it’s normal for them to be a bit stressed about it. Find out how you can help them tackle this new adventure.

Kindergarten: A world of changes

Whether or not your child has been in daycare, there are many changes that they will have to adjust to when they enter kindergarten, including the following:

• A new environment
• A new group of children, often larger than what they are used to in daycare
• New rules (for both learning and behaviour)
• A new teacher and the relationship they will have

All of these changes, happening all at once, can be difficult and stressful for your child. To help them get used to this new environment, you can talk to them about school and the emotions they’re feeling.

You can help them along by doing some transition activities together, such as going to visit the school in the springtime. You can also do a few things before school starts and during the first few days of school to help them adjust.

Kindergarten transition activities

For the transition from daycare or home to school to go smoothly, it needs to be planned and gradually implemented.

Download this snakes and ladders game to prepare both you and your little one for school (in French only). Courtesy of the Comité de la Transition préscolaire réussie de Jonquière.
 

For this reason, your child’s school probably offers kindergarten transition activities: classroom visits, meeting the teacher, touring the daycare, other in-school activities organized for future students, etc.

Stay in the know, since these activities are important. They allow your child to familiarize themself with this new environment and to more concretely imagine what starting school will be like.

If the school has a playground, you can even spend some time there with your child to let them play and get used to it.

What you can do to help your child

Before the start of the school year

• Help your child meet school friends. Find out who else in your neighbourhood will be attending the same school. Feel free to talk to their parents and organize a play date so your child can begin to make friends.

• Explain the new routine to your child so that they are ready. For example, tell them that there will be no more naps in kindergarten, and that they’ll be going to daycare before and after school. You can also watch videos that show what a day in kindergarten is like.
• Reassure your child that some things will stay the same. Tell them there will still be time to play, since kindergarten is all about learning through play. Give them examples that show that not everything will change after school starts: “It’ll still be Dad coming to pick you up at the end of the day.”

• Share in their joy of becoming a “big kid.” The first day of school is a big step, and your little one knows it. They might see themselves as not being “little” anymore. Talk to them about how going to school makes them feel. They may feel comfortable finally being a ”big kid.” On the other hand, they might feel a bit overwhelmed. Listen to them talk about how they feel.
• Involve them in getting their school supplies. For example, bring them with you to buy their pencils or their backpack.
• Show your enthusiasm for school. Talk about all the things they’ll do there: meet new friends, do all kinds of fun art activities, and of course, learn new things.
• Talk about your own memories of school, and how it felt to go there for the first time. If your child has older siblings, ask them to share their memories as well.
• Avoid sharing your concerns about starting school with your child. They need to feel that you trust their new environment so that they can adapt well.

During the first days of school

• Get ready together. Involve your child in preparing for school, such as choosing their clothes and snacks for the day and packing their backpack.
• Explain to your child what will happen after school. If they take the school bus, tell them who will be there to welcome them home. If they go to daycare after school, tell them who will pick them up.
• If your child starts to cry when they get to school, quickly give them over to the adult who is responsible for them. Don’t prolong leaving more than you have to. Show your child that you trust the staff at their school and that you know that they’re safe in their new environment. The tears usually don’t last long.
• Ask the teacher if your child can bring an object from home to ease the transition during the first few days. It can be a plushie, a family picture, or a piece of clothing that smells like their parents that they can have with them when they miss home.
• Put a simple message in their lunchbox with a drawing like a heart or a smiley face to make them happy. It’s also reassuring for them to know that you’re thinking about them even when they’re at school.
• Put a calendar up at home that shows school days and days off. Take a look at it with your child to help them understand their schedule. For example, you can count how many sleeps are left before the weekend.
• Set aside a place in the house where your child can display their school work. You can even decorate this area together (e.g. a bulletin board, a bedroom door).

The staggered system

To help ease the transition, many schools use a staggered system at the beginning of the year. These models vary from school to school.

On the first day of school, your child may spend an hour or two in the classroom. In some schools, the group of students is divided into two or even four. Each group then comes to school at different times. This means that your child might attend school every other day or only for half-days.

In some schools, this system is in place for several days, while in others, it is only for the first day. In any case, it allows the students and the teacher to get to know each other.

This might complicate your schedule, since you will have to work around this during this time. Some schools are no longer using a staggered start for this reason, but others still deem it to be necessary.

Some schools offer daycare for this period, but this is not always the case. Find out the schedule for your child’s first two weeks of school. This will help you get organized.

To learn more about life in kindergarten, check out our fact sheets:

• The daily routine at kindergarten
• Entering kindergarten: Parents’ and children’s fears
• Learning to like school
• Coping with stress when starting kindergarten
• Kindergarten for four year olds
• Kindergarten: A place that’s different from daycare
• Teaming up with your child’s teacher
• Kindergarten: The first visit
• What do kids learn in kindergarten

Things to keep in mind

• Starting kindergarten is a big change in your child’s life, so it’s normal for them to feel a bit anxious or stressed.
• You can help them adjust by talking about kindergarten with them and going to visit their school together.
• Organizing play dates with classmates, going together to get their school supplies, and talking to them about the kindergarten routine are other good ways to help your child adjust.

Scientific review: Annie Lamontagne, kindergarten teacher Research and copywriting: The Naître et grandir team Updated: November 2022

Photo: GettyImages/MachineHeadz