Potty training

Potty training requires patience and perseverance. Children are generally potty trained between the ages of 2 and 4, but it’s important to follow your child’s lead.

Skills needed for potty training

In order to be potty trained, a child first needs to learn to control their bladder and bowel movements. Most children can’t recognize the feeling that they “have to go” until around age 2. That’s when they learn to identify when they need to pee or poop. They also have to be able to get to the potty before it’s too late.

To pee and poop on the potty, toddlers need to be physically and, above all, psychologically, ready. This learning process largely depends on the child. That’s why it’s so important to trust them.

Watching books and videos about potty training can help children gradually understand that one day, they’ll be able to feel pee or poop in their tummy or bottom, and know how to get it out. Talking about other physical sensations (e.g., hunger, thirst, fatigue) will also prepare them for learning how to decode these things.

To help your little one develop their curiosity about physical sensations, you can tell them when you feel like you have to go. For example, you can rub your belly and say, “Oh! Mommy has some pee-pee in her tummy that wants to come out. I’m going to go to the bathroom.” You can also invite them to go into the bathroom with you.

If they join you, you can draw their attention to the sound of pee flowing or poop falling into the water. Then show them the pee or poop in the toilet and talk about what it looks like. This will help your child feel less afraid when it comes time for them to do the same.

The 6 key steps of potty training

1. Follow your child’s lead

There’s no point forcing your toddler to use the potty if they’re not ready. This can slow down the learning process and have negative consequences later on.

Children start by being potty trained during the day. Nighttime potty training typically happens a few months later. However, potty training age can vary a lot from one child to the next. For this reason, it’s best to avoid establishing a set age by which you expect your child to be potty trained. Wait for your little one to show signs that they’re ready. Then follow your child’s lead.

Potty training takes an average of 3 to 6 months, but can sometimes take longer if the child starts before they’re truly ready. Nighttime potty training can also take longer. Before the age of 5, there’s no need to worry if your child doesn’t wake up to go to the bathroom.

Some signs that your child is ready to be potty-trained

• Their diaper stays dry and clean for 2 hours or more.
• They’re able to get partially undressed without your help.
• They tell you when their diaper is full (e.g., they say “pee” or “poop”), or seem uncomfortable in a dirty diaper.
• They start to clearly express their needs related to physical sensations. For example, they might say, “Want milk!” when they’re hungry or thirsty.
• They want to take off their diaper and start wearing underwear.
• They go somewhere to be alone or hide when it’s time to pee or poop in their diaper.
• They go to the potty and sit on it by themselves.
• They follow you when you go to the toilet, act curious about what you’re doing in there, put their stuffed animals on the potty, like stories about potty training, etc.
• They can go up and down stairs, and squat and stand up. These skills are an indication that they have developed control of their pelvic muscles and sphincters, which will help them control bowel movements.

2. Choose the right time

There’s no ideal time for potty training. However, you should start the learning process during a period of relative calm at home.

It’s important not to start potty training at a stressful moment for your child, such as during a move or shortly after a new little brother or sister is born. It’s also best to put off potty training if you’re going through a stressful period or are less available than usual.

Some parents prefer to start potty training during the summer, because they think it will be easier (e.g., letting little one run around in their underwear, less cleanup, no snowsuits to remove). Despite the conveniences of potty training in summer, the real right time to start is whenever your child shows signs that they’re ready, as potty training shouldn’t be forced.

Once you’ve decided it’s time, make sure to get your child’s caregivers on board. If your child goes to daycare, their caregivers will need to respect their rhythm. To learn more about this topic, please see our fact sheet Potty training at daycare.

3. Introduce them to the potty

Potty seats are ideal for starting out, especially for bowel movements. When your child sits on one, it will be easier for them to relax the muscles that hold poop in, as their knees are higher than their hips.

To get started, place the potty near the toilet and explain to your child what it’s for. Then encourage your child to sit on it, even with their clothes on, or to sit a stuffed animal on top of it. At first, it will be like a game for them.

You can also let your little one watch you go to the bathroom. Then, encourage them to do what you do when they have to pee or poop. If they’re truly ready, they’ll want to copy you. Praise them every time they try.

4. Establish a routine

Gradually get your child used to sitting on the potty at regular times—after they wake up, after meals and snacks, and before naps, baths, and bedtimes.

Explain that they need to go check if there’s any pee or poop that’s ready to come out, but that they don’t have to actually pee or poop. For instance, you can say, “You’re going to go sit on the potty to see if there’s any pee or poop that’s ready to come out,” rather than “It’s time to pee or poop on your potty.”

If they get up as soon as you put them in place, encourage them to stay on the potty a little longer, but don’t force the issue. If they do sit back down, don’t leave them there for more than 5 minutes.

Between these trips to the potty, ask your child regularly if they have any pee in their belly (by rubbing their bladder) or poop in their bottom. Use concrete words that emphasize the feeling of pee and poop, as the idea of “wanting to poop” will be too abstract for them.

If your toddler hasn’t peed or pooped after a few minutes, let them get up and go back to playing. Don’t act disappointed or comment on it.

If they have peed or pooped, calmly point out their success. For example, you can say, “Well done, you got the poop out of you and into the potty.” It’s best to avoid exaggerated reactions or congratulations, however, such as, “Wow! You’re a champion!” Comments like these can cause your toddler to believe that you’re disappointed in them or that they’re not a champion when they don’t succeed.

5. Switch to underwear during the day

Is your child starting to use the potty often? Have them wear cloth underwear or training pants during the day. This will motivate them to stay dry.

Put on clothes that are easy to remove (e.g., pants and skirts with elastic waistbands). Overalls, belts, and clothes with zippers and snaps should be avoided. You can also let them walk around in their underwear so they can get to the potty more quickly.

Remind your child to go potty often. At their age, it’s normal for them to forget, especially if they’re focused on playing. Of course, they’ll soil some underwear along the way, but that’s all part of the learning process. Don’t scold them. If they tell you after it happens, thank them for letting you know.

To boost their self-esteem, continue to encourage them and remind them of their successes. Don’t make a big deal out of it if they pee or poop in their underwear. Let them know that it’s not a big deal and that you’ll help them recognize the signs next time. If your child has already started to use the potty successfully, things will only get better over time.

If your toddler is having frequent accidents, you can switch them back to diapers. They shouldn’t feel ashamed or see this as a punishment. Even if you switch them back to diapers, encourage them to call you if they think they might need to pee or poop and they want to go potty during naptime or at night.

6. Stop using a diaper at night

If your child stays clean during the day, you can let them sleep in cloth underwear or training pants during naptime. Once their diaper has remained dry for several naps, you can start letting them wear underwear at night, too. Talk it over with your child. They need to know they’re not in diapers anymore.

Keep encouraging them to call you if they think they need to pee or poop, and if they want to go potty during naptime or at night. Even if they’ve made the transition to using the big toilet, it’s a good idea to put the potty in their room near their bed, so it’s easily accessible.

Going out while potty training

If you’re planning a long outing and are worried about your child wetting their pants, put them in a diaper or training pants. But if you’re only going out for a short time and will be in a place with easy access to a bathroom, go for it! Right before you leave, tell your child to go to the potty to see if there’s any pee or poop that wants to come out. And don’t forget to bring a change of clothes with you.

If you’re travelling by car, bring the potty seat and some wet wipes. Get your child involved by asking them to pack the wipes for you. Plan frequent stops if the journey is long. Don’t let them drink too much right before you leave.

What if your child refuses to poop in the potty?

If your toddler doesn’t want to poop in the potty, let them poop in a diaper instead. Otherwise, they might hold it in and become constipated. Keep offering them the chance to use the potty whenever they feel like they have to go, but never insist or show disappointment if they don’t.

Try to figure out the reason behind their refusal (e.g., context, routine, equipment) and make the necessary adjustments. For example, you can suggest a few simple changes to their routine (e.g., “Would you like to be alone in the bathroom to poop?” or “Do you want to take your pants off completely?”).

If your child is old enough, ask them to tell you why they don’t want to poop in the potty. Sometimes they’ll be able to tell you.

Constipation can cause pain when pooping. If your child is in pain, it will take even longer for them to become potty trained. When they’re ready, they’ll go potty on their own and be proud to show you their first poop in a toilet.

At what age should a child be able to wipe on their own?

If you have a daughter, you can let her practise wiping after peeing right from the start. Teach her to wipe from front to back to avoid stool coming into contact with her vulva. This can lead to infection.

Wiping after pooping is difficult for your toddler, because they can’t see what they’re doing and their fine motor skills are still developing. They cannot wipe themselves properly before the age of 4. Therefore, they need your help.

If they have sticky stool, wiping well will be even more difficult for them. Let them start on their own, and help them finish as needed. Teach them to always wash their hands after using the toilet.

When should you consult a doctor?

Consult a doctor if, despite all your encouragement and praise, your child is over 4 years old and:

• refuses to go on the potty
• seems unable to hold it in
• shows no interest in potty training

The doctor will try to figure out why they’re refusing or having a hard time. The reasons could be:

• medical (e.g., constipation)
• psychological (e.g., the child is anxious, feels pressure, is afraid of pooping, is afraid of losing a part of themselves, needs to have more control)
• physical (e.g., child finds using the toilet uncomfortable, experiences pain during bowel movements, does not feel the urge to go, cannot control their sphincters)

It’s also possible that your child would simply prefer to continue playing rather than sitting on the potty and waiting.

Things to keep in mind

• In order to become potty trained, a toddler must be both physically and psychologically ready. This usually occurs between the ages of 2 and 4.
• You can’t force a child to become potty trained, and you should follow their rhythm and trust them.
• If your child pees or poops in their underwear, they shouldn’t be scolded or punished. If necessary, they should also be able to return to wearing a diaper without feeling shame.

Scientific review: Josiane Caron Santha, occupational therapist Research and copywriting:The Naître et grandir team Updated: October 2025

Photos: GettyImages/LSOphoto, Ryan McVay and Uliana Petrosian