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Six common childhood fears and how to deal with them

Childhood fears are common, but kids tend to outgrow them with time. Even so, your little one needs your help to overcome these anxieties. Discover tips and strategies.

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Fear of Santa Claus and clowns

Childhood fears are common, but kids tend to outgrow them with time. Even so, your little one needs your help to overcome these anxieties. Discover tips and strategies below.

Costumed characters can seem intimidating and imposing to a child. Your little one may not be able to tell whether they’re safe to approach. What can you do to help?

  • Prepare your child ahead of time.
    If you’re going to see Santa, explain that he’s friendly and that sometimes, kids like to sit on his lap to talk to him. Read books or look at pictures together so the character becomes more familiar.
  • Don’t force your child to go up to Santa, a clown, or a team mascot.
    Let them observe from a distance so they can get used to these strange figures.
  • If your child is scared, don’t hand them to the person in costume, even if it’s just for a quick photo. Instead, pick up your child and go up to them together, without making any physical contact.
  • Sit on Santa’s lap yourself.
    For some kids, this will take away some of their fear and may even make them laugh.
  • Trust the ripple effect of other kids.
    Seeing their big sister walk up to Santa, a clown, or a mascot may encourage your child to do the same.
What worked best for my child
“Last year, Édouard freaked out when he saw a clown in a show at daycare, and again when he saw some jugglers at a circus festival. The same thing happened when we tried to take a photo with Santa Claus: He screamed and wouldn’t stop crying. So we bought him a book about the circus, with pictures of clowns and jugglers. It seems to have worked because he wasn’t afraid when we went back to the circus festival this year. Similarly, we plan to tell Édouard in advance about our plans to visit Santa in December. We’ll show him videos of other children having their picture taken with Santa so he knows what to expect. When we go, we’ll let him decide whether or not he wants his picture taken. Now that he’s talking, it will be easier for him to let us know how he feels. We’ll respect his decision.”
Alex, father of Édouard, age 2

Fear of doctors, dentists, and shots

Childhood fears are common, but kids tend to outgrow them with time. Even so, your little one needs your help to overcome these anxieties. Discover tips and strategies below.

Costumed characters can seem intimidating and imposing to a child. Your little one may not be able to tell whether they’re safe to approach. What can you do to help?

  • Prepare your child ahead of time.
    If you’re going to see Santa, explain that he’s friendly and that sometimes, kids like to sit on his lap to talk to him. Read books or look at pictures together so the character becomes more familiar.
  • Don’t force your child to go up to Santa, a clown, or a team mascot.
    Let them observe from a distance so they can get used to these strange figures.
  • If your child is scared, don’t hand them to the person in costume, even if it’s just for a quick photo. Instead, pick up your child and go up to them together, without making any physical contact.
  • Sit on Santa’s lap yourself.
    For some kids, this will take away some of their fear and may even make them laugh.
  • Trust the ripple effect of other kids.
    Seeing their big sister walk up to Santa, a clown, or a mascot may encourage your child to do the same.
What worked best for my child
“Last year, Édouard freaked out when he saw a clown in a show at daycare, and again when he saw some jugglers at a circus festival. The same thing happened when we tried to take a photo with Santa Claus: He screamed and wouldn’t stop crying. So we bought him a book about the circus, with pictures of clowns and jugglers. It seems to have worked because he wasn’t afraid when we went back to the circus festival this year. Similarly, we plan to tell Édouard in advance about our plans to visit Santa in December. We’ll show him videos of other children having their picture taken with Santa so he knows what to expect. When we go, we’ll let him decide whether or not he wants his picture taken. Now that he’s talking, it will be easier for him to let us know how he feels. We’ll respect his decision.”
Alex, father of Édouard, age 2

Fear of the dark and monsters

Childhood fears are common, but kids tend to outgrow them with time. Even so, your little one needs your help to overcome these anxieties. Discover tips and strategies below.

Many children experience nighttime fears, as their imaginations can run wild in the dark. What can you do to help?

  • Reassure your child that monsters don’t exist in real life, only in books and movies. You can check once under the bed with them, but no more than that. If you do it every time, you’re sending the message that there’s a reason to be afraid. You can also tell your child that you’ll come check on them when they’re asleep to make sure everything is okay.
  • Establish a calm bedtime routine to make your child feel secure, such as a bath followed by a story.
  • Place a small night light in your child’s room and give them the choice to use it or not. You can also give them a flashlight to keep by their bed.
  • If your child wakes up scared in the middle of the night, go comfort them right away and listen to them without interrupting. Then, help them understand the difference between what’s real and what’s imaginary. It may also help to take your child to the bathroom or to get them some water to distract them. If they’re still anxious, you can lie down with them in bed until they calm down. However, don’t make a habit of doing this every time, as it may reinforce their fear.
What worked best for my child
“Alex Emilio doesn’t like being alone in the dark. He thinks there are monsters lurking in the shadows. We’ve explained to him that monsters aren’t real, and we often remind him that he’s not alone in his room, because his brother sleeps in the top bunk of their bunk bed. At bedtime, we stay for a while as he falls asleep. We’ve also put night lights in his bedroom and in the hallway so it isn’t pitch dark when he wakes up at night. He still gets scared, but they make him feel a little better.”
Renato, father of Alex Emilio, age 4

Fear of dogs

Childhood fears are common, but kids tend to outgrow them with time. Even so, your little one needs your help to overcome these anxieties. Discover tips and strategies below.

Many children experience nighttime fears, as their imaginations can run wild in the dark. What can you do to help?

  • Reassure your child that monsters don’t exist in real life, only in books and movies. You can check once under the bed with them, but no more than that. If you do it every time, you’re sending the message that there’s a reason to be afraid. You can also tell your child that you’ll come check on them when they’re asleep to make sure everything is okay.
  • Establish a calm bedtime routine to make your child feel secure, such as a bath followed by a story.
  • Place a small night light in your child’s room and give them the choice to use it or not. You can also give them a flashlight to keep by their bed.
  • If your child wakes up scared in the middle of the night, go comfort them right away and listen to them without interrupting. Then, help them understand the difference between what’s real and what’s imaginary. It may also help to take your child to the bathroom or to get them some water to distract them. If they’re still anxious, you can lie down with them in bed until they calm down. However, don’t make a habit of doing this every time, as it may reinforce their fear.
What worked best for my child
“Alex Emilio doesn’t like being alone in the dark. He thinks there are monsters lurking in the shadows. We’ve explained to him that monsters aren’t real, and we often remind him that he’s not alone in his room, because his brother sleeps in the top bunk of their bunk bed. At bedtime, we stay for a while as he falls asleep. We’ve also put night lights in his bedroom and in the hallway so it isn’t pitch dark when he wakes up at night. He still gets scared, but they make him feel a little better.”
Renato, father of Alex Emilio, age 4

Fear of bugs

Childhood fears are common, but kids tend to outgrow them with time. Even so, your little one needs your help to overcome these anxieties. Discover tips and strategies below.

Your child may be afraid of insects and spiders because of their strange appearance. Perhaps they’ve been stung or bitten before and now think that all bugs are out to get them. What can you do to help?

  • Encourage your child to view insects and spiders with curiosity and gradually expose them to bugs in their environment. For example, take a moment to observe ants carrying food back to their colony or a spider spinning its web. You could also take your child to an insectarium.
  • Help your child get used to the bug that scares them. Find a picture book about it that you can read together. If possible, observe it in its natural environment.
  • Ask your child to describe exactly what it is about the bug that scares them. If you understand their fear better, you can give them the information they need to feel less afraid.
  • Let your child invent pretend bug killers or traps. This is their way of gaining a sense of control over their “enemy.”
What worked best for my child
“Angelica has Inuit roots. Our little ‘child of the North’ isn’t afraid of anything—except spiders! She’s okay with letting ants crawl all over her, and she’s really into ladybugs. But when she sees a spider, she starts shrieking and yells “Mom!” It’s super dramatic. I go over and calmly let her know that I understand she’s afraid. Afterwards, we observe the spider from a distance. If we’re at home, I pick up the spider with a tissue and let her see me either take it outside or put it in the garbage if it’s dead. I explain that spiders are harmless, just like the insects she loves so much. That calms her down.”
Chantale, mother of Angelica-Laisa, age 5

Fear of disasters

When a child witnesses a natural disaster or tragic event in person or on the news, it’s normal for them to feel afraid. What can you do to help?

When a child witnesses a natural disaster or tragic event in person or on the news, it’s normal for them to feel afraid. What can you do to help?

  • Help your child name their fears. Talking to them about their emotions and worries can help ease their fears. If your child is afraid of a natural disaster, for example, ask them to describe what it is that worries them.
  • Stay calm and keep your answers simple. Use age-appropriate language and limit your answers to the questions they ask. Avoid giving details that could add to their fears.
  • Offer reassurance and understanding. If they’re worried about a rare situation, explain that it’s not something that happens very often. Remind them that you’re there to protect them and that they can count on you.
  • Explain that help and support is available for people affected by natural disasters and other tragedies. For example, you can explain that when a forest fire or flooding forces people to evacuate, they are taken in by other people or stay at their local community centre until it’s safe to return home.
  • Avoid exposing your child to violent or disturbing images. Limit their screen time and be vigilant about what they watch.
  • Try to calm your own fears when a disaster occurs. If your child senses that you’re anxious, they may become even more fearful.
What worked best for my child
“Albert is terrified of accidents. Once, when a friend of his from daycare fell while crossing the street, Albert couldn’t stop crying. He’s always asking questions about things that scare him. During a storm, for example, he’ll ask what would happen if lightning struck the house, or whether a lightning bolt can burn someone. He’s curious about these things, but they also scare him, so I answer his questions without going into detail. To make him feel better, I emphasize the fact that he’s safe with the adults who look after him. I’ve also told him about firefighters and police officers and how they’re always ready to help in an emergency.”
Amélie, mother of Albert, age 5
Things to keep in mind
  • Childhood fears are common, but they can be overcome.
  • It’s important to help your child verbalize their feelings and name their fears. Talking about their emotions makes them less overwhelming.
  • Helping your child face their fears, without forcing them to, will help them move past their anxiety.
Naître et grandir

Source: Naître et grandir magazine, November–December 2024
Research and copywriting:The Naître et grandir team
Interviews by Amélie Cournoyer
Scientific review: Annie Goulet, psychologist

Photos: GettyImages/PeopleImages, GettyImages/Motortion, Nicolas St-Germain, GettyImages/Lightfield Studios, Nicolas St-Germain, GettyImages/Lightfield Studios, Nicolas St-Germain, and GettyImages/ilkercelik

RESOURCES

Books for kids

  • Couturier, Stéphanie. Le livre de mes émotions : la peur. Illustrated by Maurèen Poignonec, Gründ, 2018, 24 pp.
  • Latulippe, Martine, and Nathalie Parent. La peur de Mathis. Illustrated by Sophie Lussier, Saint-Jean Éditeur, 2020, 28 pp.
  • Watt, Melanie. Scaredy Squirrel Visits the Doctor. Tundra Books, 2022, 40 pp.

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